


oh, won't you be my one and only?

by Lavisyste



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, F/M, Fluff without Plot, Heart-to-Heart, Romance, cullen has a guitar and oh boy hes going to seranade you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-07 15:25:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18413426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lavisyste/pseuds/Lavisyste
Summary: She's most beautiful against the evening sun, when she thinks he isn't looking at her. She tells many tales, too, though few of them are happy. Despite her harsh edges, there's a soft loneliness at the core. It comes out in the early morning, and it makes him upset.He'll sing her all the songs she wants, if it makes her smile.





	oh, won't you be my one and only?

**Author's Note:**

> lyrics taken from the song sophie by the band the altogethers

The sun was setting, Cullen noticed, when he returned from work. The large windows let in the light flood in, and gave the living room a dazzling orange glow. He chuckled. He had done it again! He supposed it was her influence; by himself, Cullen wasn’t visually that artistic. He was better with music and his guitar. But with some help, he had gotten better.

 

It was her apartment - _theirs_. He had moved in not too long ago, so he had still had some trouble differentiating his single life with his now not single life. In the end, he enjoyed moving into her apartment. It seemed like not an inch was spared toward her career, and everything just popped with color. Color theory extended beyond the canvas, she told him once. Color theory could also be applied to things like interior design -  _was_ implemented. 

 

A few steps took him toward the kitchen, where Leia was cooking. He blinked in surprise as she looked up, and waved at him. She smiled, and went back to her phone, where she listened as some type of chef explained his recipe. Various cuts of meat were laid out on a wooden cutting board. Untoasted buns and a block of cheddar sat next to each other. If he took a closer look, he thought he could see lettuce in a colander in the sink. Burgers for dinner then. He was so proud of her - she had done a lot. 

 

He knew to others, it seemed silly to be proud of your girlfriend actively cooking. But, he’d been with Leia long enough to know she had many struggles, and he had been with her long enough to see them. Her days were a cocktail of pharmaceuticals; she fought through exhaustion, weight gain and loss, restlessness, to name a few. Without her medication, however, Leia had to deal with the full force of her auditory hallucinations. So, she took her medication. When he didn’t understand, which had been often, she had explained it like this; it was like having someone screaming in your ear constantly. You couldn’t turn it off, or ignore it, because it was so constant. _ ‘How would you feel?’ _ She had asked.  _ Bad, _ he’d said. That was how she usually felt - bad. The medicine helped, but it wasn’t always a one and done thing.

 

Cullen felt like he had a better grasp on the whole thing, as he sat down on the couch to relax. He hoped, anyways. He didn’t want to sound like an idiot anymore.

 

 _“Are they demons,”_ _he asked, ignorant_. _He supposed he was, but Leia had mentioned being a mage once, hadn’t she? Though she didn’t use her magic anymore, for reasons she had let to explain._

 

_ “No,” she responded, and huffed. “I know when the voices are demons. I’m a mage, Cullen, whether I like it or not. I was taught these things by the best scholars my parents could afford. I don’t hear demons that often, though. They like to say they scare the demons off, because my head is too noisy to inhabit.” They, as in the voices, Cullen quickly realized. _

 

_ He laughed, without having meant to. He rubbed the back of his neck when he noticed. “I’m sorry, is it okay to laugh? I promise I’m not laughing at you. It just seems funny to me that a horde of voices could ward off demons.” _

 

_ Leia took a moment, and blankly stared at the ground. After a minute, she smiled. “They don’t mind.” _

 

Generally, Leia didn’t feel comfortable most of the time to talk about her mental state. From all that Cullen knew, it had caused her a lot of grief as a child, to the point of being dangerous, even. It exacerbated an already difficult childhood - another topic Leia never felt comfortable with. She had said, once or twice, that it felt stupid to say she had a hard childhood. By all accounts, her family was rich. She grew up with every materialistic desire sated  at a moment’s notice. Beyond that, she never spoke about her parents other than their overwhelming amount of money. She was an only child, and she hadn’t gone to public school. To Cullen, it sounded an awful like she hadn’t felt loved by her family. Her desire for love had caused her to create something she longed for, and in the end, she had it destroyed by her own hands. 

 

_ The Incident _ , she called it. She hated speaking of it. What he knew was that it involved a painting, the start of her disorder, and the very last time she had used her magic. It had been fire, and she had burned her hands. She had cried for days on end, because she couldn’t paint, couldn’t do what she loved. He never pressed for details. As much as he wanted to know the whole thing, it was clear how much it still hurt Leia. She would get small, and stare at the floor. 

 

Nowadays, Leia had little to no contact with her parents, except for the occasional holiday postcard. Cullen didn’t blame her; it really seemed like the parent/child bond was never really formed to begin with. Every time he saw the postcards, he thought of his own family, and the same cards he’d send. They had been together for a long while now, hadn’t they? Maybe it was time to introduce her to his family. He remembered something about them visiting soon. It was his sister’s birthday, and they wanted everyone to get together to celebrate.

 

Turning away from remincising, he saw that her fingers tapped the counter rapidly. Leia was looking intensely at her phone, trying to follow the recipe, but dealing with it poorly.  She only tapped that much when she was mad, and didn’t want people to notice. But Cullen noticed it anyway, because he loved her and he liked to look at her. “Are you having a hard time? Do you want me to help?” He asked from the couch, but she shook her head.

 

“I’ll handle it,” she said, still looking like she was having a hard time concentrating. “It’s nothing,” she spoke again, but it sounded like she was trying to convince herself more than him. After a beat, she sighed.

 

“Someone keeps laughing over how he eats too much cheese. I can’t hear the chef, and they won’t stop.”

 

“I’ll go get my apron,” Cullen smiled, and Leia huffed.

 

Whoever it was that laughed over the chef might have been right, he thought as he glanced at the recommendation bar on the video site. There were countless recipes with cheese in them, and the burger was just the oldest one, as far as Cullen could tell. Moving on from that, he went to help her out. He got out the meat grinder, and repeated the meat to put in next when she couldn’t hear the chef. She mostly got her hands dirty when mixing the meat in with the listed spices, and he mostly got his hands dirty forming the patties. After the lettuce was given a quick wash, she set up her countertop grill to cook the burgers.

 

“It feels silly to say…. But I like hearing it sizzle. And pressing it down,” she confessed. “You’re laughing at me, aren’t you?”

 

“No,” he smiled. “I used to love watching bread rise in the oven as a kid. Some things are just fascinating.”

 

Before long, domestic bliss was reached as the heavenly scent of burgers filled the kitchen. While they weren’t exactly gourmet, they were delicious burgers. After a long day of dealing with Solas, he couldn’t wait to dig in. They got comfy on their couch, and Leia turned the TV to watch one of her favorite dramas.

 

It was called  _ Centuries _ , and it was about an immortal witch who lived in the woods. She had been scorned by her lover, and cast out of her hometown. In the prologue of the series, the witch had found a baby girl near a river, abandoned. The plot followed the witch taking the baby in, who she raised as her own. It was a pretty good series, all things considered. The commentary had been about the hatred of mages in earlier ages, and the destruction it had caused. The secondary theme, which Cullen think Leia appreciated more, was about how to exactly define family and parenthood. It was on the second season, where the baby was now a teenager who had shown signs of magic.

 

“So… Family’s important, right?” He asked casually, in the middle of the episode. He didn’t know when a good time to bring this up was, so he figured now was good out of any. 

 

Leia quirked an eyebrow. “Yes….?”

 

“My family is coming down for my sister’s birthday,” he explained. “Everyone’s coming, so I thought I could introduce you to them.” He was hopeful, anyway.

 

She sighed, and turned away from him. He didn’t follow. He knew that Leia didn’t like to be chased after or coddled. He knew that her relationship with her parents had long since been shattered before it could even form. He knew she wasn’t receptive to meeting his family, thinking it would end in a disaster. It was a constant issue between them. Cullen loved her, and he really wanted to be with her. He wanted her to be an important part of his family, but Leia let her self-doubt get in the way. 

 

“It’ll be okay, Leia. They’ll love you,” he said, trying to comfort her.

 

“I really doubt that,” she mumbled. “Maybe they’ll like me at first, but when I have to explain what I am…. They’ll probably think I’m a possessed mage. Maker, I  _wish_  I was possessed. Then there’d be an obvious solution.” She said bitterly, and he wished she didn’t say things like that. He knew where she came from, with all of the assumptions, but they could explain. They could explain until they understood, like Leia did with him.

 

“You know I hate it when you say those things, Leia,” he said softly, and shifted closer to her. “You’re a wonderful, beautiful person who is amazingly talented. You’re the strongest and most caring woman I’ve ever known. How could they not love you?” 

 

Leia sighed again, and turned. She leaned into him, and he held her closer. “You’re always so sure, Cullen.”

 

“Because I know my family, Leia, and I know you. I know it’s hard, but you shouldn’t worry yourself so much over it. You won’t be alone - I’ll be there with you, and I’ll make sure everything goes smoothly. You really aren’t giving yourself enough credit. You are stronger than you know. I mean, I don’t know how you deal with Solas being so… aggressive around you, yet you stand your ground firmly.”

 

“I’m not afraid of disappointing Solas, and his creepy fetishes. I _am_ afraid of your family. You make them sound so nice, and I’m not… Nice.” She sighed again.

 

“You are nice, Leia. I wouldn’t be with you if you weren’t. And listen, I know you have a hard time talking. But what if you made them a painting, to express your feelings? I think they’d really like it, and you’d have a springboard to talk from.” He suggested, hoping it could be a solution. Leia was terrible at social interactions for obvious reasons, but as soon as she talked about her heart, she went for hours on end; even if the subjects jumped from random point to random point.

 

She chuckled. “Right, inspire them to like me?”

 

“Why not,” he retorted. “You inspire me. In fact, you inspire me so much, I’ve written a song for you.” He smiled, getting his guitar from his case, from just behind the couch. He had been working on the song for a few weeks, or on his lunch break. Though, he had to hide his lyrics from Bull, before he was made fun of.

 

“Cullen the Guitar Man, here to woo me with cheesy love songs?” She laughed again, and shook her head. “Everyone thinks you’re a loser.”

 

He laughed, and propped up his guitar. “They can say whatever they’d like. As long as you like it, it’s the only voice that matters.”

 

Leia turned off the TV, as Cullen tuned his guitar, and moved their dirty plates to the coffee table. Part of him was a bit nervous. He knew she liked his music; she always wanted to hear his new songs, whenever he made them. But maybe that was just part of what came with sharing personal art to others, even those you loved. Maybe that was how he'd always feel, when he shared something so vulnerable in the open. Maybe he’d never stopped being nervous, even after years of being together. He’d sing her all the songs she wanted, though, if it would make her smile. 

 

“Frontline, the doorstep is the front line. A battle field of landmines, set to blow when I walk in. But lately, you’ve been calling me baby. So, I can walk in safely, to let those glory days begin.” Leia draped herself over him, and made room for his arms as he started. He caught his reflection in their TV. He caught  _Leia's_ reflection in their TV, as he continued singing. She always looked beautiful when she thought he wasn’t looking at her. All her harsh edges melted away, and left her heart on her sleeve. She looked at him like he had hung their moons in the sky, and gave life to the stars. She looked at him like he was the only thing that mattered. He loved her. He hoped that whenever he looked at her, she saw the same things. He hoped she saw just how much she meant to him, every time he looked at her.

 

“Oh, won’t you be my one and only? I know you’ve always known me to make the rules up as I go. All the same, I think we're winning this game, though we've never given it a name. And if no one looks up, they’ll never see my smiling face, and your warm embrace when you’re standing next to me.” She smiled as he winded down, and wiped a few tears that formed on her cheeks. A tear still rolled down, though, as she surprised him with a kiss. He kissed her back until they were both left breathless. It was never long enough, if he was honest. He'd kiss her forever, if he could. 

 

“Maker, Cullen. You really are the cheesiest asshole on the face of Thedas. I love you.” She laughed, as she kissed him again. “You made me cry. You’re awful.” 

 

“You’re smiling, though,” he teased, and she sighed happily.

 

“I know, and I hate it. I’ll give the painting idea a try. You said you grew up in Ferelden, right? Near Lake Calenhad? I’ll see if I can make a picnic scene. Lakes... are generally good for picnics,” She said, and he nodded. 

 

“I think they’d really like that.” 

**Author's Note:**

> i hate you with my entire being brian david gilbert


End file.
